Engineering Management for the Rest of Us by Sarah Drasner

Author:Sarah Drasner
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Skill Recordings Inc
Published: 2022-09-16T21:49:56+00:00

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5. https://www.bluebeyondconsulting.com/2018/11/this-is-your-brain-on-feedback-how-understanding-a-little-brain-science-can-make-a-big-difference-in-your-next-feedback-conversation/

6. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/close-encounters/201812/why-do-we-people-who-are-similar-us

7. https://ed.stanford.edu/sites/default/files/uhlmann_et_2005.pdf

Chapter 12

Receiving Feedback

As a manager, you can also ask for feedback, so that you can grow, iterate, and evolve your ability to lead and help your team. A nice side effect of this practice is that it cultivates a culture in which growth and learning are valued and seen as a natural parts of work. It can move feedback away from a place of fear and into that place of care we were talking about earlier.

Receiving feedback can be difficult, but it’s also the best way to grow, and the best way to demonstrate the kind of vulnerability you will need to cultivate to have honest communication on your team. Because receiving feedback is so vital, you have to be careful to ask for it when you are mentally equipped to receive it. In this chapter, we cover some tools for how to ask for and process feedback. Please note that receiving feedback is intrinsically tied to how well you take care of yourself and build your resilience as a leader, which we cover further in Part 4, “Your Work.”

The more you listen to what areas you can grow and address them well, the easier it gets to do it again. It will likely feel uncomfortable for you the first time, not unlike the first time a programmer writes a for loop. Over time it becomes more natural and can be seen as an opportunity, and a kindness the other person is offering you.

Soliciting Feedback to Grow as a Leader

There are many ways we can solicit feedback, here are a few examples:

Send out an anonymous feedback form. This can allow people to be honest without fear of retribution, because there’s always going to be power imbalance.

Ask for feedback in a group about a particular project or event. This is useful because it keeps the feedback specific and focused, with less chance of an awkward ad hominem attack situation. If you do this, be okay with an uncomfortable silence so that people can process and think (I have a hard time with this one).

Ask for feedback in a 1:1. You can do this a few different ways, but it is a good idea to let people know ahead of time that you will be asking for feedback so that you don’t throw them off guard. Power dynamics can make it tough for people to assess what they’re comfortable sharing on the spot.

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